When you’re a mom, finding time for the basics: sleeping, eating, and dressing up is hard. Sure at one point in your life you had other aspirations than becoming “just a mom”... But finding time to pursue your dreams or passions doesn’t have to be impossible. Finding a balanced lifestyle that works for you doesn’t come over night. In fact for the first few months of my parenting journey I found myself in a rut. Here’s what what I’ve learned about pursuing my dreams while being a mom! 1. Write It Down What is it that you want to accomplish? Do you want to write a book? Go back to college? Or maybe even start your own business? Whatever your dream is: Write that ish DOWN. There’s power in writing down your goals and dreams! I found myself writing daily affirmations that reminded me of who I was and what I wanted to contribute to the world during my time on earth and that’s how I eventually started my first business.
2. Set Expectations Whew hunny, I know your probably thinking I don’t even know what to expect tomorrow as a new mother so how am I suppose to set expectations for something that hasn’t even happened yet. The answer to your question is that setting expectations for your everyday demands will actually help lead to LESS frustration.
3. Tell Your Family Having a support system that you can share your dreams with is also important because you will need as many accountability partners as you can find! Your family knowing about your goals and visions can also help them understand that a lot of your time may now be spent pursuing them.
4. Invest In Yourself Yes sis, I see you! That means LIMIT THE SHOPPING! You must now place your money where your mouth is! Moms tend to put every one first the kids, your man, dog or cat; leaving themselves dead last. By investing actual money in your dreams you now place emphasis on how serious you are about this goal. It’s no longer just talk and you’ll be taking your first actual step into your new reality! Remember that feeding a dream requires money.
5. Make Space How do you expect your gifts to make room for you when you don’t even have room for them!? Making space for your dreams whether physically or mentally is a giant leap forward in the right direction! In 2016 I knew that I wanted to start a blog for new mothers like myself but I also knew that I needed a space that was inviting, one that encouraged creativity and that would allow me to think freely. I cleared out a room and that became my safe haven.
6. Network I don’t know a mom who isn’t busy! We pack diaper bags, schedule appointments, chauffeur kids to school then practice, and some of us even remember to place scriptures in our kids lunch boxes to help encourage them during the day! Even in the midst of your chaotic schedule, it is important to surround yourself with other women who also find time and energy to go after their hearts desires. Surrounding myself with a like-minded community has also shown me that many times there is power in numbers. I’ve been able to collaborate with other “mompreneurs” in order to reach larger audiences while still accomplishing my overall goal! Facebook groups have also helped to provide another way of feeling connected to people with similar aspirations.
7. Extend Grace Okay so I don’t know about you, but any time I start to write especially for my blog I start thinking about the million other things that I could be doing like playing outside with my son, preparing a more elaborate meal, washing clothes, or even preparing for the next day. Pursuing my dreams often leads to a lot of mom guilt, but I’ve learned to give myself the grace or permission to work towards something I want. I wish that I could say that once you extended grace to yourself once that you won’t have to do it again but the truth is this step has to be repeated for as long as you’ll be a mom chasing after her dreams! Get use to telling yourself it’s okay!
8. Find Some Downtime I haven’t met a mom whose favorite time isn’t nap time! Whether your kids are napping, watching tv, or even outside enjoying some sunlight; seize the opportunity that downtime provides.
9. Have Patience Now that you’re a mom , your timeline may have gotten pushed back but that doesn’t mean that your dream is dead! It's one thing to sacrifice for your kids, and another thing to sacrifice your own dreams/hobbies/lifestyle before you've really tried to balance it all. Remember that mothers don't just exist to serve. They also exist to inspire. You are unstoppable, give your dreams time to manifest. Don’t limit your abilities by placing time constraints on your success.